Review of Eyes of the Heart

When Christine Valters-Paintner from Abbey of the Arts asked for volunteers for her blog tour, I signed up. I don’t do book reviews unless it’s something I just happen to have picked up and really really want to share with the world, but as I was halfway through one of her previous books, “The Artist’s Rule” I wanted to review “Eyes of the Heart: Photography as a Christian Contemplative Practice”. 

I received a Kindle copy of this book in exchange for my honest review, which as I use Kindle on my iPhone probably wasn’t the best format. Perhaps because what I had was a review copy, there were some formatting issues throughout with the subtitles and quotes.

But I knew agreeing to review this book was the right idea when I read the section on “The Art of Beholding” in Chapter 1. One of my words for this year is “behold” (the other is “abide”). In this book, I learned about my word in a way that will reinvigorate my exploration of “behold”.

I am not much of a photographer, although recently I’ve started to take more than vacation snaps, via a resource that Christine also listed in this book, and also via Christine’s “The Artist’s Rule”. For me, it’s all about looking for God’s presence in this world, and where God is speaking to me right now. 

As Christine reveals in her book, with photography we shape our world to share who we are, what we believe and think. You see it every day on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, etc. Christine guides us to a different way: contemplative photography asks us to receive images instead of choosing images to take. Through this process, as well as later sitting with the photos, we catch a glimpse of God in our world. 

Christine leads us deeper into the various pieces of each photo: dark and light, cropping, color, and reflections. The chapter on shadows had every possible point of view in theology and philosophy and I found that to be a bit too much information. 

Given, this is a book meant to be walked through not raced through as I had to review in time for my slot. I certainly plan to re-read it again at a walking pace and follow long with the exercises that will build my understanding and my practice of a new contemplative way.

If you’ve read “The Artist’s Rule”, I can recommend the “Eyes of the Heart”. There’s hardly any overlap. It is more a development of what Christine has already written.

If you’re a photographer who is looking to explore the world around you, this is a great book.

If you’re a beginner photographer, you’ll still have to read another book on the techniques of photography if you want to go beyond “point and shoot”, but with “Eyes of the Heart” you’ll be seeing pictures in a whole new way.

(Note: the Amazon link is not an affiliate link, just one quick way to order the book!)

Joy Dare Monday: what a week!

It's been a week. As of this morning, I'm officially an employed person once more. Well, the job offer came in last week. I haven't the least idea how it's going to affect my blogging, but we're going to go with the flow and see what happens.

Here are the God-gifts for this past week:

384. fans
385. another second interview request
386. cream in the tomato sauce
387. soft fur
388. two job offers
389. I got the job! happy, happy!
390. badly limping dog
391. barely limping dog (phew!)
392. ants galore
393. three pelicans soaring (1 seagull, then nine pelicans, then 12!)
394. cake (for last day at volunteer place)
395. walk
396. singing
397. bath
398. blister bursting
399. dessert wine
400. taking turns chanting
401. catching up
402. gift
403. squalking stellar jay (who just wouldn't stay still)

404. perfumed roses

405. the promise of blackberrying
406. bubbles cascading down skin
407. best burger ever
408. candle
409. restless night
410. sketching before breakfast

411. new grocery shopping routine


Joining in Ann Voskamp's:

so much beauty #1

Liz Lamoreux invited her readers to find 10 beautiful things this past weekend. An easy task because we had a weekend getaway to Julian (staying at Butterfield Bed & Breakfast, where we always stay, and eating at Jeremy's on the Hill).

I thought I'd start with a mirror reflection. Me seeking calm in a not-so-well-lit-after-all room.

They are mostly flowers -- but Ed's garden was just gorgeous. Beautiful things in no particular order:

#1

#2

morning sketch (took me almost an hour!)

#3

didn't think of a photo until halfway through the second mocha profiterole and ice cream ...

#4

blackberry flower

#5

#6

#7

#8

orange zest on breakfast plate

#9

#10

Also linking with and Laura's Playdates with God.

Joy Dare Monday #whateveritis :)

Yesterday, I posted a happy ending to something that had been bothering me this past week. You can read that post here, which also has a link to the post before which if you haven't read already you should if you want to make sense of the linked-to post.

Um, I'm sure I could've written that sentence better.

Here's the past week's gifts from God:

361. walking home in windy, wintry rain with no umbrella (ella ella)
362. a glimpse of sun
363. dust
364. conversation with a guy who's been living on the street for 20+ years. Nice fellow!
365. hanging out on Library Walk
366. wasting food :(
367. good chronological bible discussion
368. fluffy clouds
369. crisp cool
370. honest conversation
371. the challenge of leaning in
372. overnight succumbing to fears and unheard-of expectations
373. early morning quiet
374. cool breeze on a cloudless day
375. yellow daises
376. request for second interview
377. [redacted, will share when I can]
378. interrupted cuddle with "go poop!"
379. sitting on the back seat
380. reading in the memorial garden
381. late night painting
382. INcarnation

383. dog's face in front of car a/c


Joining in Ann Voskamp's:

Brilliant! I Wasn't Expecting That!

A couple of days ago I posted about Mother's Day being a non-mother by choice. I shared the link on Facebook saying that the second title would be the one that's now the title of this post. A riff off the Christmas video from New Zealand.* I didn't expect that I would actually use it for a follow-up post. (Er, brilliant.)

I wrote in that previous post that my church is pretty inclusive - we refer to mother figures on Mother's Day. Due to that tradition as well as being chair of the worship committee, I was part of the planning for today. I arrived early to help out and do some last minute logistics. As occasionally happens, plans had changed.

Brilliant! I wasn't expecting that. 

Well, it wasn't exactly a surprise as the committee had just finished talking about planning ahead and yet allowing the Holy Spirit to move with last minute inspiration.

Chris preached (link to mp3) on how God makes covenants with households from Abraham through to entire households being baptized in the early church. Which means God has made a covenant then with those in the Upper Room with Jesus and thus with all the Church, and thus with this church.

Shortly after, at announcements, he suggested that given the sermon, he couldn't segregate us into two genders, and so as we're all one household: we're all each others brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, grandparents, grandchildren, everyone would get a flower today. He reminded us that the carnation is also a symbol of the INcarnation.

I wish I remembered the exact words he used... I found myself tearing up because I was included today.

Brilliant! I wasn't expecting that.

Members of vestry (the church's board) were invited to hand out the flowers while the choir (which i'm in) sang the offertory.

They ran out of carnations.

The one time I was really one hundred percent included, I didn't get a flower.

Brilliant. (Not.) I wasn't expecting that.

During communion, we finished all the scheduled pieces. Tom played piano with one hand while flipping through the hymnal with the other. He started playing "Soon and very soon we are going to see the King." We start singing.

And I realize the meaning of the lyrics: that I will one day see Christ.** What is the lack of a flower against knowing Christ will never abandon us? I felt that deeper wilder love.

Brilliant! I wasn't expecting that!

At the end of the service, the choir processed to the back of the church during the recessional hymn as we usually do. Revbecca announced that not everyone had received flowers, including the choir, and encouraged those who received flowers to go forth today and give them to someone else. She meant to people outside the church, I'm sure, as we (the choir) can't have been the only ones not to get a flower.

As the choir headed back to the front to collect our belongings, a parishioner handed me her carnation. Her kids handed over their carnations to others. It wasn't the only flower offered to me either. I am pretty sure that every choir member who wanted a carnation got one.

Because my church is a household of God and we live out our motto of "love. be loved." 

I felt loved today.

Brilliant! I wasn't expecting that. (But I should have.)

* Of course you want to watch the video again. Here it is:

** So I'm not sure if the song is actually about looking forward to dying and going to heaven, or looking forward to the second coming when the world will end, neither of which being exactly happy things, I just know I felt love.

PS. My mother-in-law received my carnation and my hubby's.

linking up with Jennifer Dukes Lee's #TellHisStory


and Laura's Playdates with God.

God's Love Stories

Another month is on us already? Where does the time go? This is a mix of stories of vulnerability, of self-care both beautiful and hard, and of caring (or not) for others.

• Alise Writes beautifully of preparing herself for a very personal talk (and listen to the music at the end of her post too)
• Wordgazer on silencing techniques
• I recently started following artist Flora Bowley and as part of her 30 day Blog Affair, she shared these reminders about creating art.
• and I always seem to share something from Liz Lamoreux. This is excellent to hang onto if you are in need of taking a breath. Or twenty.
• I saw this amazing young man at an awards ceremony I was attending because my nephew was getting a reward. Watch the YouTube video to see how Javier Espinoza has transformed the pain of his young life to improve the lives of others.
• Rev. Margaret Watson shared a heart-breaking letter she wrote to her representative. Please read it. She works on a reservation that is in desperate straits after sequestration. And yet we got an FAA amendment. What is wrong with this country's priorities? (sorry, but this one made me livid.) How is sequestration affecting your neck of the woods?

Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

What To Expect When You're Not Expecting

What to Expect When You're Not Expecting (and Never Will)

1. awkward silence after they ask "how many kids do you have?" (Or other questions where children are assumed to exist in your household)
2. swallowed tears after they ask "so when are you two having kids?"
3. or swallowed anger or a sharp retort bursting out of your lips at the same question
4. the rush of mooshiness (you know that's a word) on seeing a newborn and being glad that the emotion is no longer *really* bittersweet
5. your pets will become as adored as if they were your flesh and blood children
6. being able to travel whenever you want - at least until the pets come along...
7. that one Sunday in the year that is super awkward because you chose to be childless.

Yeah, you heard it right. Chose. 

I did try to get pregnant for a while, but when it got down to fertility drugs and the concept of triplets, well that's when I bailed. The concept of being responsible for one child terrified me. So three?

For a time I tried to get healthier to better my chances of getting pregnant naturally ...

We got older and the window started closing. We were content where we were, despite my occasional maternal urge.

Part of me was relieved: I was convinced I would make a terrible mother and didn't think I could handle it.

Once a year, I'm reminded of that series of decisions. Those decisions were the right ones and I am happy where I am now -- and to be honest, giving thanks that I don't have to figure out where money for college will come from.

But once a year, it feels like the world is telling me I made a bad decision, that I have epically failed my husband, our families, and even God.

Even at my church, where we bend over backwards to include mentors, teachers and mother figures on this Sunday -- and I thank God mothers aren't asked to stand -- it still feels weird to take a flower home unless it's going directly to my mother-in-law. 

I am not a failure. But I have to say, I'm getting pretty tired of being defined by what I do not have on this one day a year.

PS. My husband pointed out on reading this that it was a "we" decision not an "I". Isn't he awesome?

PPS. Gorgeous prayer for those of you who are childless for whatever reason (whether you chose to or not)

Tentatively linking up with Jennifer Fulwiler's:

and linking up with Jennifer Dukes Lee's #TellHisStory