Leanne Shawler, Artist

This is the last entry for the Joy Dare challenge for 2012! I made it to over 1,000 gifts! I don't plan to stop though. Here's my list, which starts with Christmas Eve... 1,117. brief sunlight 1,118. iPhoto crash removing photos I'd just deleted from my camera 1,119. working on my Ticket to Venice journal, listening to Christmas songs 1,120. standing shoulder to shoulder in a candlelit circle singing "Silent Night" (I love the late Christmas Eve service!) 1,121. chanting Christmas Lauds with my husband 1,122. Christmas crackers 1,123. the miracle of powdered sugar 1,124. baking with a friend quick cinnamon buns... 1,125. [redacted] 1,126. early rising moon 1,127. first layer of mud on wall (this is a good thing) 1,128. mare's tail clouds 1,129. the movie "Les Miserables" 1,130. finishing the Bible in a Year Challenge 1,131. seagulls evenly spaced in an empty shiny parking lot (shiny from the rain) 1.132. getting rambun...

page in spiritual autobiography clear journal The tenor of the posts I read yesterday reflecting on Holy Innocents Day and ultimately the deaths of innocent children worldwide through war, famine, neglect, or abuse, still reel with the grief over the Newtown children. I prayed Lauds yesterday, reaching for the feast day readings and prayers in hope of comfort in some truth, and actually found very little solace, but I think that's because I've never really come to grips with the whole idea of martyrdom. I finally got to see the Les Miserables movies yesterday and Eddie Redmayne's rendition of "Empty Chairs..." reminded me of a classroom with empty chair and empty tables (not to mention he sang it beautifully) and tears flowed down my cheeks. Here are some of the stories that circulated on Holy Innocents Day: Holy Innocents and violence against children (with a story about a 2010 icon of the feast day), from The Lead at the Episcopal Cafe a re...

It's been two weeks since the lives of 20 children were taken in a school in Newtown, CT. Today is the Feast of the Holy Innocents . King Herod, afraid of this newborn king, ordered the death of all the baby boys in Bethlehem. Joseph was warned by an angel and got the Holy Family out of town and to Egypt in time to escape this. Whether this actually happened or not, is for the Bible scholars to decide. In Germany, two years ago, I came face to face with the fascination of Holy Innocents. The Bavarian royal family kept relics of these babies (or of babies claimed to be from that massacre) in ornate reliquaries. Holy Innocents reliquary in Munich, Germany. Perhaps in this way, without the benefit of endless repetitive news coverage, they could remember that innocent lives can be lost through greed or cruelty. Or perhaps they were just part of the relics craze. For all the news coverage, we don't remember that well. The children of Newtown are still uppermost in our me...

Merry Christmas all! I thought I would share images of my practice journal and my "for real" journal for Mary Ann Moss' Ticket to Venice class. I highly recommend the class. It is so much fun! (Clicking on the image above will take you to her blog for more info and to register.) This is the practice journal. This is the "for real" journal with some inside pages. It's a vicarious look at Venice as Mary Ann is keeping us up to date with her trip in Venice and I so want to go that this has become a planning/dreaming journal for a future trip. I had so much fun going through my stash and finding stuff I didn't know I had. Pages inside: And here's what I said on Facebook after I'd finished the "for real" one. I started journaling in this after I took these photos. So check out this class or one of Mary Ann's earlier classes.

almost time for this moment - it's Christmas Eve (statue @ Mt. Calvary, Santa Barbara) I haven't taken photos of the journals I made, like I planned, but I'll post about them during the week and have links up in next week's Joy Dare link up. Can you believe that it's almost a year and the Joy Dare is almost done? Not that I plan on stopping any time soon. How about you? 1,099. we don't have a water leak! 1,100. watching Bread and Tulips - breathing in Venice 1,101. making my favorite Christmas treats 1,102. not having any rum essence 1,103. rain 1,104. White Elephant gift exchange 1,105. dark red maple leaf 1,106. freezing cold morning 1,107. "Brilliant. They won't be expecting that." ( link to Youtube video -- a must watch found via Ann Voskamp) 1,108. Springerle didn't work out. Again. 1,109. rocking out to Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas is You" ( inspired by this video ) -- dancing and rolling rum...

I have a post in me to support what the Episcopal Church is calling for in national policy in the wake of what happened in Newtown, CT this time last week. I thought the first week anniversary date would be an appropriate place to write it, but I have a different call moving in me. I suspect that other post will have to wait until the Feast of Holy Innocents, after Christmas. Now, however, no matter what time you're reading this, please breathe in deeply. Let it out slowly. Remember the lost and those families who have lost them. Just for a minute or two. Thanks.

I've been doing a little bit of reading about Eastern Orthodox Christianity lately as part of learning more about the Jesus Prayer. Since I first contemplated writing an icon, I've been curious about setting up my own space for prayer. (There is a website that has a whole stack of them, plus I pulled together some favorites on a Pinterest board. ) It started in my art room. I papered the back wall of the closet in pages from an old commentary about the Psalms and hung up a cross. You can see it in an older post here . But then I happened to chant morning prayer in our formal lounge room and thought: hmm, it sounds like I'm in an echoing chapel (thanks to the wood floors and the fireplace, I think). So I've moved my space out to the formal lounge room and finally hung the pictures this week. There's no before shot because I keep forgetting to do those kind of things that might be remotely useful in blogging. Ah well. In a traditional Orthodox home, this actu...

It's hard to talk about joy when the events of Friday still haunt. I heard about it on Facebook when I returned home from my errands. It didn't seem real until I saw the news coverage. I could only bear watch a little bit of it. First graders. Dear God. I couldn't write down any found joys that day. It didn't feel respectful, although while I had debated whether or not to curl up under a blanket or instead continue with the day's plan of some Christmas baking... I decided those heaven-arrived children would much rather have cookies. That doesn't make a whole lot of sense, I know, but I thought subdued normal would be better than giving up on the day entirely. Surrendering to dwelling on the trauma seemed like a win for darkness. (As I did the same on 9/11, I'm pretty sure this is my coping mechanism for horrors. Everyone handles such things differently.) I prayed and continue to pray for them all: the little ones and their teachers in heaven, their...

I first heard about the feast of St. Lucia from a Norwegian friend when we worked in the office together. So I made her these buns based on this King Arthur Flour recipe . They were okay, a bit dry and tough. Turns out it was the way I made them. Pretty sure I over-kneaded.  Or maybe the yeast wasn't fresh enough. Anyway. So I had a second crack at it last night, in honor of my friend and, of course, for St. Lucia. They're yummy. And St. Lucia? She's a virgin martyr saint from Roman persecution times who is very popular in Scandinavia for some reason. ( Wikipedia has an opinion .) The girls dress in white wearing a crown of candles in their hair at the church service. Her name means "light" and in this Advent time of waiting for the Great Light of Jesus to be born, it's an appropriate saint for the season. A little saint-light who had eyes only for Christ, no matter what her culture demanded of her. For me though, it's a day to remember my...

Are Christians really, well, Christian? Would my words and actions show me to be a Christian? Would yours? I'm not getting caught up in the "my theology is better than your theology" rubbish, but I am talking about the basics of walking the Way of Christ. How those who do not believe see we Christians. Below, I use "we" a lot. It includes Christians who don't think like me, and Christians who think about this stuff a lot more than I do. We are seen as  hurting the people we want to come to church , or instead of helping to heal those who have been hurt by those who go to church; We are seen as legalistic and judgmental as we go to court about nativities or commandments or cross displays instead helping the least  (found in Rachel Held Evans' Sunday Superlatives ), aka the Beatitudes in Matthew; My denomination is working at bringing equality to GLBT persons, but all anybody sees is the hate of the Westboro Church; Bottom line, we don't do e...

This is close as I can get to winter images in SoCal; I took it in January of this year, I think. I woke this morning feeling like I was coming down with something, the dog puked (mostly water) and the other dog danced in it, and I felt like I'm already done with the day and I hadn't even had breakfast yet. Then the Abbey of the Arts email arrived and I watched this meditation . (link goes to Abbey of the Arts site and has suggested preparation for watching it and for afterward. I recommend following the instructions, cleansing breaths are wonderful things in themselves.) The words that came to me through this video were stillness and silence.  And I thought how unlike that it is for me in December with Southern California cold clear days, Christmas music, and TV. For me, still would be under a blanket with a cup of something and a book while it rained outside, like a cocoon. I came back to that word: cocoon. Like God is a cocoon inside of us, wait...

The highlight of this week was our churches' Advent Choral Celebration. My church, Good Samaritan Episcopal Church, and the UCSD Newman Center Catholic Community combined to present a Lessons & Carols like service. We read the story of God's promise throughout history that resulted in the birth of Jesus Christ. This was the second time we've come together as two communities becoming one to share this service and it was the best. Hopefully I'll be able to share some of our  performance later. Meanwhile, there are a lot of references in this list to practicing for Saturday night. 1,060. out of paper towels 1,061. don't need new glasses 1,062. "--ria" (the last two notes in the Ave Maria piece) 1,063. waking up already singing: "Glory to God, Glory to God on high.   Messiah has come.  Love has transformed this night." (lyrics from Shepherd's Joy piece practiced last night)  1,064. icy cold fog 1,065. beautiful guide...

I can remember these ornaments being on our family tree forever. They are possibly as old as I am. (I'm sure Mum will leap in and correct me.) I loved to sit by the tree and play with the angel in the middle with her pink gingham dress imagining a story for her. I cannot remember any of those daydreams, but I know the elf was involved. Not the gold angel, she was too perfect to play with. When Mum was downsizing her Christmas decorations because she no longer puts up a big tree. These are the three I insisted on having. And they are on my tree today. Well, except the gold angel whose loop broke while I tried to put her on the tree, so she'll stand next to Santa and at some point go into the "workshop" (aka my art room, where I've taken care of a tiny elf and one of the three kings so far this year) for repair as soon as I figure out how as the loop goes into her head. Hmm. The poor elf has already had its loop replaced, has a dented face, and my pink ...

1,049. yoga instructor making sure my back was straight (I think) 1,050. power outage 1,051. almost full moon in a twilight blue sky surrounded by pink sunset clouds 1,043. gnocchi carbonara 1,044. watching the sun disappear behind thick marine layer 1,045. shafts of light coming through marine layer camera couldn't quite handle dull day and windows in need of washing... 1,046. contented bliss during yoga 1,057. stepping in dog pee 1,058. smell of cinnamon after baking 1,059. gooey cinnamon goodness 1,060. finding the intensity in scripture (Bible Challenge talk) 1,051. silver slick morning streets 1,052. encouraging college students to fill a World Vision HIV/AIDS Caregiver kit (and the yummy bagel the organizer provided for volunteers!) 1,053. gentle rain (and that I brought an umbrella!) 1,054. dogs skunked while I watched a video upstairs 1,055. trying to corral them both into the bath tub (must admit -- I yelled out them when they kept jumping out) 1,05...

altar at monastery in Stroud, NSW I missed a month due to being in Australia at the time, but here's a collection of links that have attracted my attention since my return. There is not a whole lot this time, alas. But hey, at least I don't share links for the sake of sharing links! Like Thunder Follows Lightning by Winn Collier. This is one I'll have to read again and again because there is so much to unpack (found via one of Rachel Held Evans' Sunday Superlatives) for giggles: Stephen Colbert's rendition of "The King of Glory" because we sang it last Sunday and I sooooo wanted to dance.